no self helps


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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    CD version includes Kill Alters' 2015 self-titled debut as bonus material
    includes free digital download on bandcamp.
    Artwork by Max of Hausu Mountain and KA

    HAUSMO61 - CS / CD

    released July 28, 2017

    Kill Alters is:
    Bonnie Baxter
    Hisham Bharoocha
    Nicos Kennedy

    Mastering by David Little Mastering
    Drums recorded with Eli Crews at Figure8
    Art elements by Bonnie & Hisham
    Design by Max

    Check out more music on Hausu Mountain <3

    Includes unlimited streaming of no self helps via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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For Barry Crimmins

the ep is 33:05 exactly

music video for Sensory

music video for Ego Swim

the idea of kill alters was birthed from when bonnie got hold of cassette tapes from her mother's self documentation throughout her life starting in the mid 70's into the 90's. while digging through these tapes baxter soon found more information and gained more access to memories of when she was 4 yrs old.

The Kill Alters Archives


released September 15, 2016

Bonnie Baxter - vocals, drum machines, electronics
Hisham A. Bharoocha - live drums, electronics
Nicos Kennedy - laptop, electronics

Artwork by Hisham A. Bharoocha

*drums tracked by Eli Crews at Figure 8 Studios

mixed & mastered by David Little
*in loving memory of Cassie

*special shout out & thank you to Matt Kilmer & Pablo Lopez


all rights reserved


Track Name: Sensory
start it now
start it right this time
oh that's when i didn't follow
when they sound like ditty dah ditty dah
if you see my pictures at all

big live figures
came right through my door
big man seek her
said here baby doll
you'll become weaker
take off your clothes
get faded
touched my veins
a medicinal psyche blur

then a halt
eyes gloss
a tentacle cling i reach for safety
hushed words
get lit from the sting
dissolves what's tactile
must get her
must pick up the pace
more sickened displaced from it
me sitting
in a vegetated state
raw filter blurred frame

they know they know they know
they knew exactly what they wanted
and they hid from me
they know they know they know
they just take take take take take
they owned me

now she got
mental visions mental visions

the beast the curse
high visions dead space
you call it what you wish it
I become that fate

see if that works
your mental escape
oh well it doesn't matter
you'll bring on that hate

sensory sensory sensory sensory
Track Name: Ego Swim
i'm a be your hell
when you fend me off
i come shutting it off in you
the fearing don't see their true end
fill dead lakes
ego swim
then fall back into the faux flow trance
i don't fear i don't flinch
was benign in you
ripped the shell of you
infliction then kisses
yea infliction then kisses

and the tail light sees her
when i want i see her
any chance i see her
where he walks i see her

where i was part of you circles
defeated covered in shit too
and in the feedings our limbs spun off
couldn't out run you then
but now i'm running into you
Track Name: The Holder
harsh lies
blank stares
is it this all i know
it intercepts my patience
and grips my heart
have to kick down the kingdom
put fear in them
power that plagues the vacant
and many have
got their hardwired pace in
not letting up

that i know
if it takes my life

there's no shift awakening revolution
it's a self in waiting
an illusion
hardwired all embracing
not anymore
i'm a be invasive
rip through your skull
that i know
i need this i need this

stand aside
in latent time
i gain silence
tame the wire
then i set the fader higher
tune in lower bluish cast her
reel it inner
blast it out her
find the holder
chew my power
bent you stay asleep until the nausea hits

oh that's not life
if it takes my life it takes my life
does it make sense
can't rationalize

you cling to her behind a wall
the spear to flame can teach you
the ones cut off
beyond the herd can reach you
you make the way
you break the fall
you risk it all
say fuck it all
say fuck it all
say fuck it all
and take

i'm on earth
that i wonder
in the dark i will gain
i will grow out
see through the dark
no sense
the illusion
no sense
no sense
no sense
Track Name: Shrill Birdy...Wart Therapy
eyes that reveal eyes within
eyes that reveal eyes within
eyes that reveal eyes within
eyes that reveal
eyes that refigure

retrace life you're in the dark
only fail yourself
cold light is hitting you hard

and it takes over
let it take over

can't defend the lost
while their heads are dead
can't depend on gods
its still life no end

i feel i shrill like a birdy
calling the gills below me
fixed upon less the shield can hold me
real life is a killer killer
it doesn't feed my spirit
the ones in tune i feel it
mind set upon clouded visions
been through this before
done with that

seek for the power and seek
we are the power

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